i have gained 3 pounds. One might think that this has made me upset, but it hasn't. You see, those 3 pounds are pure muscle. i haven't lost any inches around my waist according to the tape measure, but i have gained muscle there (i can open and close my belly button with my muscles now, it's really weird). For the first time since i started losing weight (a little over a year ago), my clothing is truly starting to get loose and fall off me. i have bought several pairs of size 16 pants, and the size 18's i bought right before school started are already getting looser.
Since i started this semester, i have decided that i do not want to be thin. i would like to be thinner, of course, but i do not wish to be a stick or a twig. All the Venuses that i have seen so far in my current art history class are HUGE; they used to be the ideal. Things have changed so very much! So many celebrities and models are too thin and it disgusts me. i will never be curvy, but i am curvier, as strange as that may sound (less flab, more feminine shape). i hope to never stop being an athlete, and i hope to never be so thin that you can see my ribs or washboard abs. Women are meant to be round: i embrace this. At the moment, i think i might be revising my goal to just get under 200, and then see where i go from there. i'm not sure that 165 is as feasible for me as it once was.
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